(Originally posted at http://voy.com/60734/)
Date Posted: 19:07:42 03/05/04 Fri
Author: Anonymous
Subject: Deception and manipulation
In reply to: Chris 's message, "Remembering things in retrospect..." on
06:21:34 02/23/04 Mon
When I was in UBF, even as I started to listen to my own misgivings about UBF, I never entertained the idea that my "shepherd" might have been deliberately deceiving and manipulating me. However, the very day after I left UBF, my eyes started opening. Looking back on my UBF experience, I can now see that a lot purposeful deception and manipulation was involved. When I was in UBF, I believed that these things were the result of a misunderstanding between me and the UBF Korean "shepherd." I also heard other American "shepherds" saying that they had a "communication problem" or "misunderstanding" with their Korean "shepherd." I now believe that these weren't innocent misunderstandings going on. Rather, they were calculated acts of deception and manipulation.
I could write about a lot of instances of this deception. However, one series of events stands out in particular. I had recruited a Korean-American "sheep." Looking back, it seems that my UBF Korean "shepherd" had it in mind to make life hard for my "sheep" from the start. When I said "sheep" was just beginning his "Bible study," my "shepherd" called my "sheep" at home to argue with him and bully him around. My "shepherd's" explanation was, "Because he is Korean, he musta know about how great awah UBF ministree eez. I will teacha heem over phone."
From time to time, as my "sheep" continued his "Bible study," my "shepherd" would call him at home. My "shepherd" explained that he was "training" my "sheep," that my "sheep" was an "old Christian," that my "sheep" did not know God at all, that all Korean-Americans are "cultural Christians." My "sheep" confided in me that he felt very pressured and condemned by these phone calls. However, my "shepherd" continued to harass him over the telephone. I told my "shepherd" that I thought it wasn't a good idea to keep calling him and pressuring him. However, he continued to make the calls, prompting my "sheep" to ask me again to have the calls stopped. After a couple more calls, my "sheep" approached me and told me he wanted to discontinue the "Bible study." When I informed my "shepherd" of this, he said "Okay. Let him go. He does not want to study Bible. He is not true Christian."
Now, this "sheep" was a very honest and sincere Christian. Not in the least bit a "cultural Christian," not "rebellious," always faithful to keep appointments, etc. Looking back, I think he was a marked man from the time he first got into UBF, because of his ethnicity. I think it is most probable that my "shepherd" took it on himself to put excessive pressure on this "sheep" so that he would leave, and I would get a white American "sheep" instead. I remember being told on several occasions when all this was going on, "Race is not important. But next time, you would do better to get white American sheep." Also, the fact that when this "sheep" left, my "shepherd" said, "Okay, let him go," instead of trying to bully him into staying, means to me that my "shepherd" was glad to have this "sheep" off his hands. Maybe even he was told from higher up in the UBF ranks that this Korean-American sheep had to go....
Anyway, I'm glad my "sheep" left when he did, and I'm sorry for how he was abused by me and by my "shepherd." But there's an interesting twist to the end of this story. Several months after this "sheep" left, I had no "sheep." I was also starting to listen to my misgivings about UBF more. Then all of the sudden, my "shepherd" told me, "I saw brother Y on campus. You should call him to restore Bible study." (Brother Y here being my former "sheep.") I bet that my "shepherd" suddenly changed his tune because he reasoned, "Well, Shep. X doesn't have any sheep and hasn't been successful at fishing. He has too much time on his hands. I need to keep him busy with mindless activities so he doesn't leave UBF. I know, I'll tell him to restore Bible study with brother Y." (Here Shep. X is myself.)
Well, I've gone on long enough about that story. I'd be interested to see if any other former UBFers have similar experiences of deception and manipulation at the hands of UBF leaders. It's frightening to think how these UBF leaders purposefully and knowingly deceived and manipulated us. I never would have thought....
-- Anonymous ex-UBFer
